CUT THE BULL: Taking another crack at it
Despite his obvious drug addiction, our Mayor somehow manages to gain traction and gain supporters.
By Brendan Louis
Our mayor smokes crack. Let’s just start there, shall we? And I think with his recent trip to rehab we can all agree that he never really fooled anyone with his ‘I only did it once in a drunken stupor’ bit. This is Bay Street and while crack is by no means our weapon of choice, we know a user when we see one. Besides, it seems like he’s in this drunken stupor daily so what does that tell us about the man who put Toronto on the map for all the wrong reasons? What is most surprising is that (a) he hasn’t been arrested yet, and (b) he seems to actually have a (dwindling) shot at keeping his job for four more years despite recently heading to rehab. Or did he?
Let me reiterate – our mayor smokes crack. Whether or not you think he does a good job and has actually lowered taxes doesn’t change the fact that he’s an actual crackhead. Look at his hands, his twitching eyes and gnarly teeth. Our Mayor clearly does his fair share of drugs and they’re not the good ones our parents used to play around with. These are hardcore, nasty drugs that make you behave completely irrational and unpredictable (see YouTube hits).
So it came as a major shock to read Simon Yau’s comments in a recent Toronto Life article in which he posited that his parents would vote for Ford in the upcoming election so long as he continued to work towards lowering taxes. And herein lies the problem: we have the biggest city in the country being run by someone clearly dealing with a bad addiction to hard drugs and yet there’s still a large segment of the voting population that chooses to look the other way. I wonder if they’re still looking away now that he’s ‘seeking help’.
Last time we had a municipal election, our Mayor slipped through the cracks due to the fact that no one of real credibility put up much of a fight in the mayoral race. This year though, there are some true candidates who will probably have some positive impact on the city for years to come. This time around, there are actually good candidates with some vision, experience, connections and, oh yeah, no addiction to hard drugs or an undeserved sense of entitlement. Our biggest risk here is that too many good candidates will result in a split vote. I’m pretty sure, however, that those running are aware of this risk and are willing to step aside when the time comes and get behind one voice in order to get rid of a bumbling fool.
Being from Toronto, this is clearly a crazy time for the city unlike anything we’ve ever experienced before. Sure, we had Mel who had his moments and even a couple of illegitimate children to boot, but that seemed somewhat normal given his glorious hairdo and Bad Boy commercials. Then there was David Miller, a veritable man/boy wonder, who promised a spaceship to the moon and instead delivered a small island airline that flew to a few destinations.
Shortcomings aside, our current mayor was able to come in and pull off a fundamentally decent campaign, capturing a segment of voters that everyone ignored. He appealed to their plights, told them he’d help solve their problems and even today he can be seen dropping $20 bills on residents in community housing. But as responsible voters, we need to ask ourselves what has this guy done of actual substance? Not what substances has he done? He was no where to be found during the past winter’s ice storm that displaced a large number of his voters, and he’s still wasting taxpayer time and money by fighting for subway trains that make no sense and fail to reach enough people to be economically viable.
In closing, our mayor smokes crack. He’s in rehab and may not actually make it back on time for the election but I don’t know how many times I can say it. So unless our police force grows a pair anytime soon and locks this guy up like he deserves, I implore all of you to pay attention and vote for someone who doesn’t smoke the bad stuff. Whoever gets our vote may actually represent our city well.
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